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175 Chazz Michael Michaels Quotes: The Best One-Liners from Blades of Glory

If you're a fan of figure skating and hilarious one-liners, then you must be familiar with the one and only Chazz Michael Michaels from the movie Blades of Glory. This iconic character has left us with some unforgettable quotes that still make us laugh out loud to this day. In this blog post, we're going to take a trip down memory lane and reminisce on the best Chazz Michael Michaels quotes from the film. So put on your skates and get ready to laugh your way through some of the most memorable lines from this cult classic!

175 chazz michael michaels quotes the best one liners from blades of glory 8634-OnlyCaptions

good chazz michael michaels quotes (2023)

Chazz Michael Michaels is one of the most iconic characters in the history of figure skating movies. Apart from his graceful moves, his hilarious and witty one-liners are what make him unforgettable. Everyone who watched the movie Blades of Glory can recite one or two of his memorable quotes. So, today we are here to talk about some of the best Chazz Michael Michaels quotes that will make you laugh out loud.

  • "I'm Chazz Michael Michaels, I'm a sex addict, I'm a recovering alcoholic, and I'm uneducated. However, I do know how to figure skate."
  • "You're a peacock, you gotta let me fly!"
  • "The only way to heal a broken heart is to give it time and plenty of cold beer."
  • "When I go out there, I have my game face on, and that's what I expect you to have."
  • "I'm a sex tornado, I'm the Ayatollah of Rock and Rolla."
  • "It's not figure skating, it's extreme ballet."
  • "The only thing I'm allergic to is failure."
  • "Always remember, if you ain't first, you're last."
  • "No one can skate like I do. No one."
  • "I take my winning very seriously."
  • "I'm like a peacock, you gotta let me fly!"
  • "I'm gonna skate circles around you, literally."
  • "I'm a peacock, captain. You gotta let me fly."
  • "My moves are so hot that they melt the ice."
  • "I'm just a sexy, winning machine."
  • "I am the Michael Phelps of skating."

funny chazz michael michaels quotes (2023)

Prepare to laugh your skates off as we dive into the hilarious world of Chazz Michael Michaels – the legendary figure skater who almost doesn't know how to skate. From one-liners to epic monologues, Chazz's wit and charm will have you quoting him for days. So lace up your skates and let's explore some of his greatest quotes (eleven, to be exact).

  • "I'm a sex addict. It's my cross to bear."
  • "Why do you care if I sing? You're a figure skater."
  • "It's not strange at all. I mean, you can have a beautiful friendship with a guy, it's just a little harder to nail him."
  • "I can't focus with all these belligerent children running around here."
  • "I'm gonna take your mom out for a nice seafood dinner and never call her again."
  • "I'm a peacock, Captain. You gotta let me fly."
  • "I'm talking about the gold. I'm talking about going to worlds."
  • "You know why I like skating? It's because it's the only time I can be who I am."
  • "Well, I enjoyed the crowd, and I enjoyed the carnage, but more than anything, I enjoyed that burrito."
  • "It's like two monkeys trying to hump a football."
  • "I'm a Mick Jagger, you're a Beatles."
  • "I'm gonna do something to you, that you've never been done before. I'm gonna rock your world."
  • "I bring nothing to the table. I'm not even a guy. I'm just a pair of loose skates."
  • "I thought shrimp fried rice was a Thai dish."
  • "Someone should put that on a T-shirt."

wise chazz michael michaels quotes (sayings)

In this world, words are powerful enough to shape our thoughts and beliefs. Sometimes, a mere quote can guide us through the toughest moments of our lives. That's why, the words of Chazz Michael Michaels, a legendary figure in the world of ice skating, have gained immense popularity and admiration over the years.

  • "Going to bed with a woman never hurt a ballplayer. It's staying up all night looking for them that does you in."
  • "The best way around is through."
  • "Skating is my escape. I just love how it feels, like flying. Plus, no one ever bothers me when I'm on the ice."
  • "If you want to be the best, you have to beat the best."
  • "If you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a ball."
  • "You can't teach someone to be a winner. You either have it or you don't."
  • "Winning isn't everything, but it sure beats losing."
  • "Success is not the absence of failure; it's the persistence through failure."
  • "Greatness comes from within."
  • "When life gives you lemons, make lemonade. When life gives you ice, become a figure skater."
  • "The difference between ordinary and extraordinary is that little extra."
  • "The only way to do great work is to love what you do"
  • "You can't live a positive life with a negative mind."
  • "If at first you don't succeed, try, try again."
  • "Believe in yourself and all that you are. Know that there is something inside you that is greater than any obstacle."
  • "Fall seven times, stand up eight."

famous chazz michael michaels quotes (2023)

Attention all figure skating fans! Have you ever watched Blades of Glory and wished you could quote Chazz Michael Michaels all day? Well, we've got just the thing for you - a rundown of some of the coolest lines ever said by the one and only Will Ferrell on the ice. Get ready to take notes, because these quotes are pure gold.

  • "I'm the only skater here who's taken a man's life so I've got that going for me."
  • "If you can't be famous, be infamous."
  • "I'm a sex addict. It's my cross to bear."
  • "I believe in the soul, the crotch, the pussy, the small of a woman's back, the hanging curve ball, high fiber, good scotch, that the novels of Susan Sontag are self-indulgent, overrated crap."
  • "I don't need any friends. I have plenty of acquaintances."
  • "If you can dream it, you can do it. That's what I always say."
  • "I'm a peacock, you gotta let me fly!"
  • "I'm gonna be your new daddy."
  • "I'm sorry, I'm not familiar with the type of thing I'm seeing."
  • "I don't know what the big deal is. Somebody hands me a skate, and suddenly I'm the bad guy."
  • "I'm Chazz Michael Michaels, and I'm the greatest sex addict who ever lived."
  • "I'm not a baby, I'm a man. I am an anchorman."
  • "I'm a disaster in the kitchen. I've started a fire with cereal."
  • "I'm a sci-fi guy. I can't get enough of that stuff."
  • "I'm what scientists call a real sex haver."
  • "I'm like a superhero without a power. That sounds really stupid when I say it out loud."

Frequently Asked Questions

1. What are some famous quotes from Chazz Michael Michaels?

Some of Chazz Michael Michaels' famous quotes include "I'm a sex addict. It's my cross to bear" and "I can skate better than the wind can blow!"

2. Who is Chazz Michael Michaels?

Chazz Michael Michaels is a fictional character played by Will Ferrell in the movie "Blades of Glory". He is a talented ice skater known for his outrageous costumes and personality.

3. What makes Chazz Michael Michaels such a memorable character?

Chazz Michael Michaels' outrageous personality and colorful quotes make him a memorable character. He is unapologetic, confident, and always willing to speak his mind.

4. Can you share some of Chazz Michael Michaels' funniest quotes?

Some of Chazz Michael Michaels' funniest quotes include "That's right, I've got wood!" and "I don't make love, I make sweet, sweet, sexy, sweet... yeah."


In conclusion, Chazz Michael Michaels quotes are a great source of entertainment and inspiration for fans of Blades of Glory. From his hilarious one-liners to his unexpected moments of sincerity, his words have become a beloved part of pop culture. If you're looking for a way to inject some humor and motivation into your day, be sure to revisit some of Chazz's most memorable quotes. Remember, as Chazz himself would say, "I'm a sex addict. It's my cross to bear."

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