770+ Quotes From Half Baked (2024) Hilarious Quotes That Stick

Prepare to embark on a hilariously wild journey through the world of stoner comedy as we delve into "Quotes From Half Baked." Released in 1998, "Half Baked" is a cult classic that has achieved iconic status among fans of offbeat humor. Starring Dave Chappelle, Jim Breuer, and Harland Williams, this film takes us on a whimsical ride into the lives of three friends who find themselves in absurd and comically bizarre situations as they navigate the world of marijuana and its peculiar culture. So, join us as we revisit the unforgettable, stoned adventures of Thurgood, Brian, and Kenny and relish the absurdity and laughter that ensues in this stoner comedy classic.

Quotes From Half Baked (2024)

Dive into the world of hilarity and high jinks with this collection of memorable quotes from the cult classic stoner comedy, "Half Baked." Released in 1998 and starring Dave Chappelle, Jim Breuer, and Harland Williams, this film takes us on a journey through the hazy and hysterical adventures of three friends immersed in the world of marijuana and its peculiar subculture. These quotes capture the essence of the film, filled with witty one-liners, comically absurd moments, and a dose of irreverent humor that has made "Half Baked" a beloved classic.

• "I wanna talk to Samson!"
• "Buttercup... Buttercup!"
• "Weed... weed... and some other stuff."
• "I'm on the wagon now, man."
• "We were gonna make a bong out of it."
• "You killed Killer, man!"
• "I got mind control over Deebo."
• "Squirrels are gay."
• "I'm Cuban, B!"
• "Get some sour cream onion chips with some dip, man!"
• "I gotta stop smokin' so much weed."
• "Y'all didn't hear that!"
• "Smoking weed is bad, okay?"
• "You got a joint, man?"
• "I'm just smokin' weed and smokin' weed."
• "I wanna see how stoned you are!"
• "Abba Zabba, you are my only friend."
• "I'll take a pound of nuts."
• "You didn't put in on this, man."
• "I can't do that, man."
• "You didn't pay for that!"
• "Is this a good movie?"
• "Let's talk about your childhood."
• "You know how I know you're gay?"
• "Enhancement smoker!"
• "Couch, you have been good to me."
• "You ever see the back of a $20 bill?"
• "Man, I'm hungry."
• "A horse kicked me in the chest!"
• "I'm here for your bitches."
• "I'm free, man!"
• "That's the nastiest burger."
• "We need munchies, man."
• "You're not gonna believe what I did!"
• "What happened to your vasectomy?"
• "You gonna eat your cornbread?"
• "Kill Whitey!"
• "Yeah, I'm kinda thirsty."
• "Love is free."
• "I'm a janitor at M.I.T.!"

Also Read: Quotes From Jerry Maguire

• "How much for one rib?"
• "You're getting fatter every day!"
• "I wanna talk to Samson!"
• "You look like a man-o'-lantern!"
• "I'm on my bike, B!"
• "Do you wanna talk about it?"
• "The last time I got high..."
• "They found a joint in your car!"
• "How's Mary Jane?"
• "You want some of this, don't you?"
• "F*** you, Joe Rogan!"
• "That's like smoking a Holocaust!"
• "I'm in the kitchen, honey."
• "I can't feel my legs!"
• "You got any grapes?"
• "This is just what I needed."
• "I'm quitting tomorrow!"
• "You can't break up with me!"
• "We'll just order a pizza."
• "The scientist who discovered that..."
• "That's cool, man."
• "Freeze, you hosers!"
• "I can't believe I lost to you."
• "Can I have some of that?"
• "You like the way he smells?"
• "I found the peanut!"
• "Don't talk about my father!"
• "I'm out of here!"
• "I'm gonna call him now."
• "We'll see you in court."
• "What's up, sweet cheeks?"
• "Butt nake... butt nake!"
• "My eyes are red."
• "You know how I know you're stoned?"
• "Where's your chocolate?"
• "I ain't coming back!"
• "I'm goin' out of business!"
• "You're a genius, B!"
• "Kenny's a b***h!"
• "You ever have sex on weed?"
• "The joint is... is molecular!"
• "Weed is from the earth."
• "I'm just a friend."
• "My n****a!"
• "The joint is… is molecular!"

• "Thurgood, did you get my cream?"
• "Marijuana is not a drug."
• "You want a taste of the future?"
• "F*** you, Krispy Kreme!"
• "You wanna get high?"
• "I'm addicted to marijuana."
• "You better be right, n****a."
• "I'm gonna beat your ass, Kenny."
• "Thurgood, you gotta relax."
• "Enhance your calm."
• "You made a booty call?"
• "I'm gonna need a lot of weed."
• "Sir Smokes-A-Lot!"
• "You owe me money, n****a!"
• "You f***in' dummy!"
• "That's my childhood idol!"
• "This weed is so good!"
• "You can't always be Mr. Nice Guy."
• "I wanna talk to Sampson!"
• "You're a pothead, Thurgood!"
• "Just get my bike back!"
• "I like Smokey, man."
• "You guys got any papers?"
• "The roach... the roach!"
• "Give me the joint!"
• "I'm moving to Jamaica, mon."
• "I'm all alone!"
• "No more 'Mr. Nice Guy'!"
• "Have you seen my childhood?"
• "What's up with that scientist?"
• "Now I'm in the mood."
• "I just wanted a little head."
• "Don't point your gun at me!"
• "Let's get the f*** out of here!"
• "You got a pet?"
• "I need some Windex, man."
• "I'm gonna call Kenny now."
• "This is the future!"
• "I'm free, n****a!"
• "That's my purse!"
• "Oh, my God!"
• "I need a quarter-pounder!"
• "Smoke up, Johnny!"
• "You know what? I'm gonna do it."
• "Is that Samson?"

Also Read: Quotes From Misery

As we conclude our journey through these quotes, it's clear that "Half Baked" holds a special place in the realm of stoner comedies. The film's humor, lightheartedness, and unabashed celebration of cannabis culture have left an indelible mark on comedy enthusiasts. Whether it's Thurgood's misadventures, Kenny's peculiar antics, or Brian's unforgettable lines, these quotes serve as a testament to the enduring popularity of "Half Baked." So, the next time you find yourself in need of a hearty laugh, turn to "Quotes From Half Baked" and relive the zany and unforgettable moments that have kept us giggling for years.